"I love you, Paul."

"I couldn't agree more," the elfin Paul Simon replied, looking a bit like a balding Einstein, hair a flame of dirtied white recession. Simon's arms, flailing about above his head and muscular as hell, were the most striking of his anomaly of features: short, squat, perfectly manicured yet completely disheveled, vein-stretched arms, taught face, beer gut. Before he proceeded to tear into "Gumboots," he corrected himself, "If you could hear the voices in my head, you'd know that's far from true."

For two hours, last night, Paul Simon and a band of unequaled talent performed their third and final performance of songs from his albums Graceland and The Rhythm of the Saints. As part of an unheardof month-long residency at The Brooklyn Academy of Music, this week was devoted to spending some time "Under African Skies."

Ladysmith Black Mambazo, the men's choral group from South Africa featured on Graceland, started off the evening with "Nomathemba," with heart-murmuring harmonies and frenetic dance moves that nodded equally to the Temptations and the Rockettes. Vusi Mahlasela followed with a stunted version of "The Boy in the Bubble," forgetting the words at one point. Nevertheless, his vocal quality and range were so stirring, it made the memory of his early stumbling melt with the coo cooing of his scat-filled rendition. By the time Paul Simon strolled on stage, the audience was so firmly engaged, his walk was followed with the intensity of a tennis ball at a Grand Slam final. The reverence with which he addressed the audience humbles me still. He seemed so at ease, though, at times, it appeared as though his fourth wall was actually some garage door window in Queens, and I was the lucky onlooker standing at tiptoe, peering through a tiny window at the rehearsal of a would-be great band, if only that lead singer could punch up the stage presence.

That said, this was Paul Simon's night. His music shone like the African sun. Those who performed with him seemed giddy with the opportunity, as we who watched trembled with excitement at the unique experience of seeing these songs come to life before our eyes. His rhythm section looked like they'd been created by Jim Henson. His own guitars seemed to want to swallow him whole. With pin drop acoustics the BAM made for an excellent venue for this, at times, 21-piece band to throw every sound from wee bird calls to what appeared to be an emptied fire extinguisher ratamat with drum sticks the size of sledgehammers.

The mostly static audience sat through performances by the beautiful Cameroon singer Kaissa and the equally beautiful and five-months pregnant Luciana Souza. It wouldn't last long though, David Byrne, iconic frontman of the Talking Heads, delivered "I Know What I Know" and "You Can Call Me Al" as thought they'd been tailored specifically for him. No one could resist the sheer jubilation of his and the band's performance. Clapping, dancing, and singing along, everyone was upended like puppets on strings by the magnetic grooviness of it all. Ladysmith's return was quick to quell the heartbeats. Their "Homeless" was tear-inducing, never more pertinent as images of those affected by the Tsunamis and Katrina floated to the surface of every last bass note. So drowned was I by this point, I was certain there'd be no respite. That is, until Simon rejoined LBM for those first notes of "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes." Everyone was on their feet, dancing, singin' and swingin.' He finished us off with rousing renditions of "Graceland" and "That Was Your Mother."

Standing there, legs numb, maybe from the dancing, maybe from the experience of having some of the world's best musicians perform mere feet from my own feet, I was awash with thought and so excited to have been part of something I'll surely never see again. Not like this. This was truly a once in a lifetime experience and a night I will remember the rest of my life.

Mars Bars! Mars Bars!
or How I Survived The Lenten Season

I gave up sugar for Lent - not all sugars, just the simple ones. And it was hard. I eat chocolate. Every day. As we speak, I'm eating a milk/white chocolate chip cookie from this place called Dessert Delivery: Say It With Flour in midtown. So, I needed something to satiate me during these forty days and forty nights spent trolling the dessert-free desert that is sugarless living.

I found the following:
Disc One - (Mostly) New Treats
1) The Dodos - Jody
2) The Acorn - Flood Pt. 1
3) White Denim - ShakeShakeShake
4) Vampire Weekend - A-Punk
5) Jamie Lidell - Little Bit of Feel Good
6) Gnarls Barkley - Who's Gonna Save My Soul
7) Ana Serrano van der Laan - Paradise
8) Stephany - Shame
9) Matt Weddle - Hey Ya (Acoustic Cover)
10) Mike Doughty - Fort Hood
11) Kathleen Edwards - Asking For Flowers
12) White Hinterland - Dreaming of the Plum Trees
13) Langhorne Slim - Restless
14) Lykke Li - Little Bit
15) Chris Bathgate - Serpentine
16) A.A. Bondy - American Hearts
.zip the whole thing!

Disc Two - Sustenance
1) Don Covay - Seesaw
2) Little Junior Parker - Pretty Baby
3) Gene Clark - Spanish Guitar
4) Roger McGuinn - Ballad of Easy Rider
5) Grand Funk Railroad - Feelin' Alright
6) Joe Cocker - Space Captain
7) The Grateful Dead - One More Saturday Night
8) Tom Waits - The Heart of Saturday Night
9) Leonard Cohen - Came So Far for Beauty
10) Eric Clapton with Robert Cray - Old Love
11) Beck - Feather in Your Cap
12) The Spencer Davis Group - Keep On Running
13) Amy Winehouse - Monkey Man
14) Stevie Wonder - Keep On Running
.zip the whole thing!

Notes: Disc One
1) Thanks, Mike.
2) Hooray for chants, claps, and ukuleles. That's ukuleles, plural.
10) This is dedicated to The Real Theatre Company.
16) The chorus smacks of John Adams. Both are perfect.

Notes: Disc Two
10) I found some old tablature when I went home for Easter. This sticks out as one I loved to play and listen to for hours. As Rob Gordon might've said, "I'll stick that in the summer of 2003 pile, but I'll have to remember I played it for someone who'd never really appreciate it. Much the same, I don't think she ever really appreciated me." Woe is me, Rob. Woe is me.
11) Dude, the Deluxe Edition of Odelay rulz!
12, 13) Run, see Run Fatboy, Run! A friend said, "It looks cheesy and sappy." Well, it's both, but it's good. I thoroughly enjoyed it.